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So it’s been a while since I last wrote because I’ve not been in the right state of mind to write. I’ve been in a bit of a funk and I know I should be writing if I’m in a funk because I’ve been WODding but my funk has been affecting my workouts but… you know…

Tonight kicked my butt. After signing up for 4 WODs this week, I saw this post from Coach:

Be sure you are hydrated, well fed (before you come), and rested for tomorrow’s workout… That is all.

I almost thought about canceling my reservation but Boyfriend assured me it would be fun (he says that all the time, and then he does a WOD and says it sucks) and I would do great.

I spent the entire day today nervous, terrified even, especially when someone posted that the WOD was Whitten, a Hero WOD meant to break someone effectively.


5 rounds for time
22 kettle bell swings
22 box jumps
400m run (500m row)
22 burpees
22 wall balls

I drank copious amounts of water, ate a good lunch, snacked on an apple around 4 and tried to not think about how it’s going to be insane and how the hell am I going to be able to do this WOD in the prescribed time?

I warmed up quickly after getting changed. I saw people with pained expressions, panting, shaking their heads and I knew what my fate was about to be. I was not looking forward to this.

We started right away. I grabbed a 25 pound Kettle Bell and a 10 pound medicine ball and the rower since my ankles are still messed up. Squats felt good so I figured I could get through the wall balls pretty well. My back was a little tweaky but I was going to ignore it as much as possible.

3, 2, 1…GO and the bell felt light for the first 21. I kept pace but slowed down during the box jumps as I do step-ups (Still scared of the stupid box…) Then the row took its toll since it’s 100 meters longer than the other people’s run and rowing takes a lot more work than running in my opinion. Burpees were burpees and the wall balls were strung in 6s and 7s so I was happy.

The wall balls became my rest period. I pussed out and switched to the 20 pound kettlebell and it was super easy but I was able to get through them quickly enough to move onto the step-ups. The row was hell every single time and the burpees tweaked my back a little further with every pike.

Technically, the class had a time-cap of 47 minutes but I told Coach Robb I was going to keep going even if he said ‘time!’ I was in the middle of the last set of my step ups when time was called and I’ll be damned if I get stuck on the time cap and have to settle for a DNF like I’ve done before.

My medicine ball was picked up and I barked at someone (unintentionally) to grab me a new one and then thanked her dearly when she brought it over. I hid behind a set of boxes and finished my burpees while everyone cooled down and did my wall balls with crazy timing.

55:10 and I hit the floor almost as fast as the ball falling to the floor. I laid on the floor for a good few minutes before finally getting up and hobbling to the whiteboard to write down my time (with an exclamation mark, thank you very much!) all ready to come back tomorrow.

My back cramped up pretty hardcore on the way home but I am now full of meatloaf (tomorrow’s post) at one with my couch and will be for a good amount of time.

So in conclusion, thank you for your service and sacrifice, Whitten. Your family was blessed to be a part of your life and I’m glad we could continue your legacy by commemorating you today.


Death before DNF

It’s been a really rough week here at Casa del Amanda.

1. The CrossFit Games were absolutely fantastic. I’ll write up a post all about it in just a bit!

2. Upon coming home, I was thrown into a very hectic and stressful week of meetings with work. I found nausea and migraines were on the menu. I had a short flu that Boyfriend was so sweet and supportive over. He slept on the couch on Tuesday after putting me to bed early with a fever.

3. Wednesday was when the real nausea started. I had shrimp for dinner on my way to BCF. First problem.

4. We had a good WOD at Badger CrossFit and I was seriously beaten after it. Row 500m. 30 air squats. 25 wall balls. 20 pull ups. 15 knees to elbows. Row 500m. All done in 15:35. I was the last one to finish but at this point I just don’t care about finishing last anymore. I just want to be finishing.

5. The last 500m row was done in 2:15! It probably wasn’t best since I was exhausted and ready to stop half-way through. I needed a break but Tyler was next to me pushing me through the last ten pulls. It was hard, I was breathless and sweating profusely.

6. I fought Pukie the clown the whole ride home, laid down on the couch and managed to settle my stomach.

7. I was sick all day the next day, threw up before lunch, didn’t eat or drink anything all day Thursday and felt so weak after work. Boyfriend stopped at the store after visiting Badger CrossFit for the OLY lifting class (which I pushed him to go to) and brought saltines, gluten/wheat free and organic crackers and some organic cinnamon and apples oatmeal to go with my 7-up and pedialite diet that mom had brought me.

8. I got an e-mail Friday morning from my boss with issues with me. I felt sick and the room was spinning. I was working hard on the things I had been given so I responded saying my health needed to be my first priority. The boss came into my office and we decided to part ways. As soon as he left my office, I ran to the bathroom and threw up. I packed up my things and went home, crashed on the couch and slept for the next three hours and, you know what? I felt amazing upon waking up to my mother calling me. My stomach had settled and my headache was gone.

9. Mom and I think it’s all psychological. My heart and my mind were telling me that this job wasn’t at all what I wanted to do with my life. I wasn’t writing; I wasn’t WORKING. Sure the money and benefits were amazing, but I couldn’t justify working at a job where my passions weren’t being used in any way. I didn’t fit there at all and it was clear that I wasn’t meant to be there. My brain and stomach and mind were telling me I needed to be out of there.

10. I called the temp agency and they’re hopefully going to call me in a couple days with a temp job. I’m working on updating my resume and I’ve been working on some freelance stuff in the meantime.

11. The whole weekend, I’ve been slowly trying to get food into my system. I’ve managed to get proteins down in the form of chicken, turkey burgers and no name steak burgers but have been afraid to fill my stomach with too much food. Mom and I went to Jimmy Johns for dinner on Saturday but I got nauseated, probably from the processed food there, so I couldn’t handle it much further than a couple bites. I weighed myself before going to Mom’s house and realized I had lost 6 pounds in a day and a half.

12. My boobs are noticeably smaller. As well as a lot of other parts of my body… but still. My bras don’t fit anymore. Luckily Boyfriend responded with “I’d still love you, even if they fell off!”

13. I slept on Mom’s floor/couch Saturday night instead of going to Boyfriend’s. BAD IDEA. My back twinged for a good portion of the next day and my headache was still going slightly. Though it was the best sleep I’d had in a really long time.

14. Sunday was a slow day but I was starting to feel better. Mom suggested I might have an ulcer, which would explain why a higher stress level would make the pain higher. I stopped at Walgreens and got some Prilosec and read the directions thoroughly. Boyfriend came over, we snuggled up and watched The Great Escape and had burgers for dinner. I made up some peppers and onions with his and only had one burger because I didn’t want to over-do it.

15. Monday I should have drank more water. I didn’t realize how dehydrated I was until I left the comforting AC of my apartment and went to the 105 degree weather of Badger CrossFit. I barely made it through the skills and my back twinged enough that my muscles spasmed and tightened up so I couldn’t even do a Burpee. The AMRAP 8 Medicine Ball Clean and Burpee (10 each) wasn’t bad in theory but I couldn’t do it. I finished one full set, crying during the Burpees because I was so mad at my body. I massaged at my back after every few Burpees and felt decent enough to get another few done. I didn’t DNF… so that’s what I cared about. I know, I know… leave your ego at the door. I couldn’t when it came to DNFing.

16. My back is all kinds of sore and stiff. I called and made a massage appointment for this afternoon. After the appointment I’ll be going to Sports Authority to get some Kinetic Tape which will help keep the muscles warm and not angry so my back can heal properly. I can feel the herniated discs so I think a massage will do it a lot of good. I can’t tell if this is the discs hurting or if it’s the surrounding muscles. All I know is that bending is a good hurt. It’s nowhere near the kind of pain I’d experienced previously.

17. Boyfriend is illin tonight. I think I got him sick with the flu or some variation of stomach flu. After the massage, I’m going to pick up some soup from Panera and bring him some 7-up and pedialite and saltines and finally be the one to take care of him.

Damn. What an update! I’ll be writing up something about the Games next!

Days 1-4

I have successfully managed to make it through four days of Paleo.

This may not seem like a lot, but for me to go four days without dairy, grains or sugars is a big thing.

So since we’re a little behind, here’s a catch up of the last week.

Sunday, Boyfriend showed me how to do a proper squat. I was used to only doing a 4-inch squat so going all the way to parallel while also keeping my chest and head up and leaning back on my heels was quite the task. Wiggling my toes also made my fingers wiggle. Boyfriend found this quite funny… and I hope just a little endearing.

Monday I joined the Paleo and Crossfit groups on Ravelry and started reading. All weekend I had been looking at Paleo recipes and I felt I was ready to get started. Monday should have been day 1 but I had creamer in my coffee, a latte later in the day and a sandwich for lunch with cheese and a wheat wrap. Dinner was good and paleo though in the form of a Jimmy John’s Unwich!  25 squats were done and I held three of them in the bottom position for about 10 seconds each. My quads were on fire.

Tuesday was Day 1 officially. I started with two scrambled eggs and three large strawberries. It kept me sustained but the Rav crowd said it wasn’t enough. I decided to add another egg and a few slices of bacon. I ran out of time to make lunch for Tuesday but I trolled the food court menus to see what I could find. A large citrus salad with onions and chicken would be just the ticket.

This would have been a good idea had the place not closed previously. Much previously. Instead I found a salad-building place and got a big salad of greens, bell and banana peppers, broccoli, carrots and cucumber and extra chicken. I had it topped off with balsamic vinaigrette. He put a lot of it on the salad though so when I go again I’ll ask for less.

Dinner was quite the event. I went to the store and got three pounds of ground beef, chicken breasts and sweet italian sausages. Boyfriend was coming over and I wanted to do something special. I whipped up my family’s recipe for marinara sauce and put a package of hot italian sausages in. I then grilled up a large chicken breast and, as Boyfriend walked through the door, I was putting asparagus in the grill pan with olive oil and salt and pepper. The marinara sauce  went well with everything on the plate and I still had a ton left over. I then made up the three pounds of meat into meatballs and added a good amount of them to the sauce. They would make a yummy lunch for the rest of the week.

Boyfriend and I set to emptying the fridge and pantry of all non-paleo items. I filled three paper grocery bags and one plastic bag of dairy items to take to Moms. The rest will either be sent to a food pantry or I’ll bring them to work to pawn them off on people.

Tuesday was a rest day since I couldn’t walk much without pain. Sitting down to go to the bathroom was proving difficult as it was.

Wednesday we started with a very healthy meal. Boyfriend and I split six eggs and four slices of bacon, cooked soft. Fat is my friend! Three more strawberries finished the meal.

I drank coffee black for the first time in years. It was bitter and left a dry taste in my mouth. I wasn’t about to cave just for the small things like that in life. I was determined to stay as strict as possible for this first month and day three was not a day to start letting cracks show. I was able to walk much more easily and my quads didn’t hurt nearly as much.

Wednesday was not my friend. I had read from a Raveler that I should look out for the “Carb Flu” and that it would hit soon. I didn’t think it would happen to me but all I could think about all day was potato chips. Popcorn. Rolls. It was awful. I was spacey and grumpy for a majority of the day. I had sausage and meatballs with carrots and lots of water. When I felt munchy, I re-filled my water bottle. Dinner was a salad from Subway for my visit with my Mom and the kittens, George and Louie. I got extra chicken and my munchies went away. When I got home I did 25 squats and held another three. I felt like my form wasn’t getting better since my quads seemed to be doing all the work rather than my hamstrings. I texted Boyfriend and he said he’d look at it.

Thursday I woke up with a killer headache. I made my normal breakfast and had the last cooked hot sausage and meatballs for lunch with a side of broccoli and guacamole. That Wholy Guacamole! stuff is actually really good! I noticed that my steps were much lighter and that I wasn’t pounding on the floor with every step like I was the week before. I found it comforting– like all the pain would eventually lead to something.

Stomach pains were stabbing at my insides every now and then and I relied on cold water to fend them off. The headache wouldn’t go away until well after dinner when I had finally left work.

Dinner was extremely late after Church and a trip to Urgent Care for the boyfriends’ ears, but while he cooked I squatted. I became frustrated when my quads kept doing all the work. I tried leaning back further to force my hamstrings and glutes to do more work and I fell over. Boyfriend just squatted in front of me like it was nothing and I got more frustrated because I couldn’t do it. His second critique of “Not bad” was pissing me off because it meant I wasn’t progressing and I wasn’t used to not progressing. I didn’t want to look like the chubby newb at the intro class on Saturday but Boyfriend assured me that I wouldn’t because my squats were actually good and I’m not going to be perfect right away. I did another few to finish out the set and proved that I could do a decent squat. I was still frustrated until dinner was ready. Three slider-sized hamburger patties and a steamed california mix of veggies and a good bunch of grapes.

Today, Friday, Boyfriend made up 5 eggs with southwest seasoning(thanks, penzeys!) and sliced strawberries. I’ll be going back to the salad-building place today for lunch and dinner is a mystery. I need to make up some more marinara for the remaining meatballs so I’ll probably do those for dinner with some vegetables and fruit. I have to go to the store. 

Tonight my goal is to drink all the water I can while at home. I start Crossfit bright and early at 8 a.m. in Tosa at Badger CrossFit. I’m extremely nervous for the class this Saturday even though I know I shouldn’t be. I just don’t want to try my hardest and realize I’m a total fuckup and I shouldn’t really be lifting heavy things over my head.