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Sometimes it’s hard for me to push myself to be motivated even though it’s so easy for me to motivate and push other people through a workout. I’m great at telling people ‘it’s 90 seconds of your life, pick up the bar and bust out those reps!’ when it’s like lifting the damn Earth to pick up the 55 pound bar.

Today I figured out my pace for running. And it’s snail speed. Seriously. SNAIL.

Admittedly I have a lot to move around, and my body isn’t yet used to the massive amount of sheer bounce, so I run a lot slower than the rest of the group. Like 400 meters behind the rest of the group slow. I honestly don’t care about this, until it starts to affect me in the end of the WOD. Today’s WOD was no exception.

Strength: it was originally some gobbledegook of reps of back squats, but if we didn’t have a 1RM, Tyler told us to find it, so I paired up with Megan and got a bar.

35lbs, no problem. 65lbs, a little harder… not much. 85lbs. It was a little harder, not by much though. Megan did the rep with a spot from Tyler and bowed out. 95lbs. A little harder. 105, harder still. 125. I made it down and got to half-squat level and got stuck and SCREAMED it up. My high-weight reps usually include a growl or yell at the wall but this literally became a scream in order to get out of the half-squat I was stuck in. One of the girls said it was like someone was having a baby. The guy next to me called it badass. It was a 20 pound PR over my 3RM of a backsquat. I was extremely happy with myself.

Right away we had to go into the WOD because it had a 25 minute time cap.

3 Rounds for time
800m run
10 Power clean and jerks (55lbs)
10 Knee to Elbows

I hate running because I’m so slow. It doesn’t bother me that everyone else passes me, but it really bothers me when I run up to the time cap and I’m determined to finish and I can’t find the strength to get to the time cap. My first run was unbroken, if slow. There was a group of people coming out for their second run when I was coming in from the first. I made up time on my favorite movement– the Clean and Jerk (“My move” as Tyler called it) and the Knees to Elbow– I made my knees a lot closer to my elbows this time too but my grip needs a lot of work. Before I knew it, I had to go back out for the run. I ran half of it, walked for about 100 meters and then came back for more running.

I was on the third run when the 25 minute time cap lapsed, so the rest of the class cleaned up my bar. I came in from the run and really wanted to finish so a girl grabbed a bar and her phone and I grabbed plates and I cranked out the 10 C&J and KTE in 1:54. Added to the time lapsed after the time cap and I had about a 29.54 time. I, and coach were extremely proud in my gumption to finish. I wasn’t about to finish on a crappy run, after all!

It wasn’t about ego, it was about feeling the need to finish on a high note: I needed to know I was doing something right– not taking forever to get an 800 meter run in. I needed to have a time: not a post-time-cap-time. I came into the box after the run with a scowl because I was out of breath and upset I wasn’t able to finish. Two minutes later I was dropping from the bar with an official time, a bit of skin removed from my hand and a grin on my face.

Segue time:

Can I just blather on about how much I love the Clean and Jerk? It’s seriously a beautiful movement, and not because I feel I do it pretty perfectly all the time and I know it’s one of the Olympic movements that proves and improves my overall strength, because I haven’t broken 100 pounds yet on it (well, I haven’t broken 100 on a lot of things, 50 on many things too now that I think about it), but it’s all about brute force in the hips and snapping the hips and using the legs to get that bar up into the rack, then one dip for momentum and it’s overhead with your feet planted or with a split jerk. The masochistic in me loves the bruises on my thighs the next morning and the soreness on my chest and clavicle where the bar rests. I love that zen moment right before taking a deep breath to fill my chest, dropping then exploding up to put a bar overhead. Let’s not forget the sound of the plates hitting the mat as I drop the bar from overhead. So exhilarating. I love seeing Cleans or C&J on the whiteboard.

Bring. On. Grace.