A Lack of Closet

It’s been tough trying to dress myself professionally for the last few weeks.

Mostly because I have no clothes in my closet.

OK so this isn’t totally true– I have plenty of clothes, but my lack of shirts is becoming harder to ignore as I have to keep throwing more and more into the goodwill pile. Plato’s Closet, sizeist assholes that they are, won’t take my fatty clothes as they don’t “cater to that demographic” which pisses me off to no end , so the giant garbage bags of clothes, shirts, jeans, jackets and dresses are left to languish in the trunk of my car.

Currently hanging in my closet are the following:

– About a half-dozen nighties including a very large long-sleeve dress for winter.
– 3 slip-and-flowy dresses.
– 5 kimono dresses. Unsure of their fit.
– About a dozen full-length cardigans
– 6 or 7 shrugs or boleros
– Two or three pullovers
– One robe I almost never wear
– 2 pairs of dress pants, one with a split ass (note to self: Overhead Squats in dress pants don’t mix)
– Workout clothes: Doesn’t count toward wardrobe, though the pants don’t fit anymore…
– Two pairs of booties, two more heels that are probably half a size too big now but I wear them anyway, two pairs of boots, one of which are too big, Inov-8s(Don’t count) and one pair of peep toe canvas shoes that don’t fit either, plus TOMS, flip flops, Vans and Chucks. All completely irrelevant.
– Oh and two pairs of men’s shorts that don’t fit anymore either.

Please note how almost everything in said list doesn’t fit anymore. The cardigans and tank tops and new pants are pretty much it. I’m frequently wearing black pants, tank tops and a cardigan to work. Or leggings and a dress. It’s kind of repetitive. And not very stylish.

Now I know what you’re saying: OH THAT SOUNDS LIKE SUCH A TERRIBLE PROBLEM TO HAVE with a healthy dose of sarcasm, but here’s the rub: I haz no moneys.

Plato’s closet took a pair of flats that are so old and disgusting from wearing them regularly and a pair of red hooker heels I have never worn without pulling a calf muscle, an ELLE skirt I never wore because it turned out to look too slutty when I was fat and now it doesn’t fit and a hooded jacket that confused the hell out of me for its choice. They gave me 20 dollars after insulting me and I walked away with my two bags of clothes and shoes and sent them bad juju.

They also didn’t have any jackets that were a: In good condition enough to be worn at the price they were trying to sell them (See holes in pockets and missing buttons), and b: Properly sized to fit. So annoying. I’ll make do until I find a real winter jacket as my old ones are FAR too big so I put them in the pile to now go to Goodwill.

This honestly is just me being a complainer. But the fact that I look like I’m wearing garbage bags in some of my stuff, means I need to go shopping. It’s just tough when I have no funds in which to successfully shop for quality clothing. I’ll be hitting up Marshalls for some cheap-as-hell nice-looking clothes.

Here’s hope.


About Amanda

I knit only when I'm not drinking coffee, sleeping or lifting heaving things and putting them back down. I'm a freelance writer and I adore my job. I don't write about this, though I do and am obsessed with CrossFit. I eat Primal and love cooking. I write about both of these things. I greatly appreciate your feedback and comments! If you like what you've seen in my blogs, please feel free to message me here or on Ravelry, or e-mail me at ashansen1015@gmail.com. I have patterns for sale! Go to Ravelry and search KnitEatLift and you'll find my patterns. The store is always growing and soon will have more patterns to purchase. I hope you enjoy them.

Posted on November 12, 2012, in FAILSAUCE, Weight Loss and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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